I spent nine months sober and I wasn’t pregnant. Maybe you should, too.

TW: self harm & substance use Who drinks champagne straight from the bottle??? Not that guy. It's the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. I'm at my in-law's house, getting my mother ready to move into her own apartment and out of their spare bedroom. The air is cool and as much of a Michigander as I am, … Continue reading I spent nine months sober and I wasn’t pregnant. Maybe you should, too.

The Evolution Of My Panic Attacks

TW: I actually found *myself* triggered as I wrote about this topic which is partially why it's late. This took several sessions to sit down and write. If you are sensitive like me and particularly prone to anxiety/panic when reading specific descriptions of the symptoms, maybe consider skipping this one. At least stay in tune … Continue reading The Evolution Of My Panic Attacks

Highly Sensitive Person Alert! HSP IS NOT BULLSHIT!!!

Last summer, I had the incredible blessing of being near home for the summer - to make it even better, Nicholas and I were able to visit our hometown and spend the Fourth of July holiday with our best friends. Looking back on it now, I can better appreciate how blessed we were to have … Continue reading Highly Sensitive Person Alert! HSP IS NOT BULLSHIT!!!

Mental Health and Medication

In the span of less than seven days, I started a new medication, lowkey lost my mind, stopped the medication, and went back to normal. Brains are funny like that. In the extremely inexact science of antidepressants, mood stabilizers, and more, it's difficult to say with any degree of certainty how each individual will react … Continue reading Mental Health and Medication

Lloyd.

When I was 21, I tripped harder than I ever have in my life by snorting two hits of 2C-B. It began with Nicholas and I highkey losing our shit (figuratively and literally), then clutching each other on the floor like scared, naked children. After the initial intensity of it was smoothed out (our dealer … Continue reading Lloyd.

Happy New Year! Diet Culture Still Sucks!!

TW: discussion of eating disordersIn a sea of unavoidable "omg I'm gonna eat nothing but bananas and lose, like, so much weight!" posts during this time of year, let me be the light of common sense. Or at least some kind of rebellion against hating yourself so much that starving seems like a good idea. … Continue reading Happy New Year! Diet Culture Still Sucks!!

Can’t Versus Won’t: Thoughts on Spoon Theory

Saturday, October 08, 2016 The past two weeks, I have had to push myself well beyond my comfortable limits. I truly dealt with the repercussions of this last night, when I was woken up out of a dead sleep by a sensation I can only describe as my arm being pulled out of its socket. … Continue reading Can’t Versus Won’t: Thoughts on Spoon Theory

Mental Health Progress is Not a Straight Line

The past week has been... a ride. It reminded me that recovery is far from linear, and things might set you back, but all you can do is keep moving forward. One of the more notable things that has happened is my recent contact with my ex, Pisces. Our conversations have been cordial with some … Continue reading Mental Health Progress is Not a Straight Line

Gratitude should come more than once a year

For my American readers, this week is home to my favorite holiday of them all: Thanksgiving. If you were unaware, my religious affiliation is vaguely Buddhist with a side of "I don't really care, God probably isn't real, but if that makes you happy that's cool". This is one of the major reasons Christmas isn't … Continue reading Gratitude should come more than once a year

Coping Mechanisms. Or Lack Thereof.

I'm a picker. Even when I'm not stressed but especially when I'm stressed, I pick at everything. Acne on my face, hangnails on my fingers, hairs on my chin, the goop in the corner of my cat's eye, the tiny spot of adhesive left after you peel a sticker, the lint off of your shoulder, … Continue reading Coping Mechanisms. Or Lack Thereof.